undeserving

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I know that no good thing is withheld from one who walks uprightly. I am also reminded that every good and perfect gift is from above.

I’ve discovered that sometimes living by faith becomes a humbling thing. There are times when I wish I didn’t have to rely on other people to supplement my income. There are times when I let pride get in the way. God has been so good to me this past semester—teaching me to trust in Him, to give others the opportunity to minister to me, to consult Him first about my needs, and to take help when it comes.

Going into Christmas break, I had reached the breaking point. I’ve seen God provide in different ways throughout the past semester (gas money from unexpected sources at unexpected times, money to cover new boots I desperately needed for work—to within the dollar), and I knew and still know that He will continue to provide. The Christmas budget I was thinking of had to drop a little bit, which is frustrating to me because of how much my parents do for me. I know they’ve sacrificed a lot in the past and what they do for me now is more than I would like for them to be doing. [And I say that with a lot of gratitude.]

Anyways, my last resort is my mutual fund which hopes to be used in the future for something a little more exciting. I was planning on getting some money out of that in order to help pay off a credit card bill and just get myself back to where I need to be to start the New Year. I was expecting to get a little bit of money for Christmas, as always, but it turned into a lot more than expected. $450 more than expected, actually. That more than covers the credit card. And tonight, my church surprised me by taking up a love offering for me, which ended up being over $200.

Funny thing is, I was thinking about taking $600 out of my mutual fund.
God always provides more abundantly than I ever imagine.
I don’t give Him enough credit.

Yet one more reason I’m undeserving.

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